First off, these last two weeks have been ridiculously crazy. I have missed writing tremendously.
Happenings include:
- 6 hour road trip back to my hometown to celebrate my best friend’s new baby!
- Cat sickness=8-year-old feline multiple UTIs
- Making future decisions regarding our family and, potentially, my own health
- Not-so-great news from the orthodontist about the future of my canine teeth
- Plus work, social events, church gatherings, adulting…
I want to say that I am very grateful for the life God has provided for me even with the ups and downs, disappointments, and surprises. But sometimes, I feel overwhelmed. And exhausted. And spiritually, mentally, and emotional spent.
So, I had a talk with God.
On the way back home from visiting friends and family, I had a long, hard talk with God. It involved tears, anger, asking forgiveness, feeling foolish, and finally, feeling like I know the direction he has for me. After this discussion, I felt better, and I had taken away two main points
- Stop trying to be that person. You know, the person who gives up her alone time, or time with her husband, or sleep to be the person there for her friend. Or ALL her friends. The person who gives, and gives, and gives and goes beyond all reasonable and normal expectations to please others.
- Be patient. Stop trying to rush things. Stop trying to rush through one season of your life to get to another one. Stop trying to rush making decisions because they are hard. Stop trying to rush completing one goal or task so you have “extra” time to work on another.
These are the worst sins and the hardest habits I have to break as a person, a woman. Because of previous experiences, I know it will not be easy. I also know that I will mess up again and again. Patience is a virtue that I need to grow into.
But thankfully, I have a Father who loves and forgives!
Cheers,
Ashlee
